Dear Outsourcer's...

We’re sorry that we do not waste our time responding to your many, many, persistent emails about outsourcing our work to India, so we felt it was about time we wrote back to you all in one go.

We would have thought that after months of ignoring your many emails, that you would have got the hint, but apparently not, since one particular company emails daily to alert us that we are ignoring them.

So we thought we’d give you all some constructive criticism about your ridiculous proposals, and maybe shed some light on why we don’t waste our precious time responding.

1) Badly written proposals.

If you send a proposal, the most important document you can send a business when after their work, that makes bad use of spelling, bad punctuation and appalling grammar as an advertisement for your ‘quality’ services, it will work as a very strong advertisement, an advertisement that shows just how bad, rushed, and unprofessional your work is.

Why would we want to give that to any of my clients? We have a reputation to uphold and build upon, a reputation for quality, not one for shoddy products like that you will inevitably produce…

2) Pestering does not win our business… Get it!?

Yes – we did receive your email, you do not need to send it multiple times per day, to all of our mailboxes, just take the hint: we’re not responding because we are not interested.

Clogging our mailboxes with this, well junk, quite frankly, will not win us over and change our mind.

Just do the respectable thing… Go away!

3) Crap Quality portfolio…

OK – wow, you have created numerous websites, and have sent us a sample of them. Sure, we’ll take a look. Some of it is pretty decent. Great stuff, well done! You have done something right…

Oh no wait a minute, within a second glance we spot:

• That the website contains spelling, punctuation and grammar errors. Somebody bought this? Seriously? They accepted all these mistakes? Why didn’t they complain? Oh wait, they probably did, but your customer service is probably appalling.
• The code is difficult to read, and, well, looks a mess. So when we come to correct your code mistakes for you, since your customer service is probably bad and you won’t do it, it’s going to give us a headache. We don’t want the possibility of having to work on that! It will cost too much time, and far too much sanity.
• OMG! It doesn’t even validate. As a designer, I agree that sometimes this is not important – sometimes it is not possible to achieve a design without breaking the rules of W3C, but that never excuses hundreds upon hundreds of code errors.
• Wow – absolutely no regard for good search engine optimisation. Fine a customer hasn’t paid for it, but still, it shouldn’t seem like you’re deliberately building a website to hamper their SEO prospects, just do nothing to help it…

Sort it out!

OK – So that’s it from us, those are the three biggest problems we have with all of the “fastest growing web design companies in India” (yes – you all claim that!).

Maybe, just maybe, if you were to implement the improvements we recommend, we might spend ten seconds reading your email before deleting it. That’s maybe. We’re not making any promises…